Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
I just jerked it so loud the neighbor banged on their floor. maybe my wife got the point
im proctoring the SATs right now and im still drunk from last night. i really wanna tell these kids that this fucking test doest mean shit and they will just be constantly drunk once in college.
I owe her a pancake or a second hand orgasm
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
I woke up tied to my bed while she was in the corner staring at me while eating cereal. Interesting night!
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's not drinking on his 21st. Shooting vodka infused Nerf bullets at him would just make a mess and I don't want to be a creep and spike anything... I don't understand awkward boys
Accidentally searched up "pizza pasties" instead of "pizza pastries". I was not disappointed.
My butt remains clenched, sir.
Turns out the guy I did all that coke with the other night is a cop
We're dating now
And, by “make you dinner” I mean “have lots of sex and multiple orgasms.” So you should probably eat something and before you come over
And hydrate too
Unless my dick prospects improve this year’s Halloween costume will include panties with “DTF” written on them and a push up bra
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