Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
No, I'm only going to drink half my paycheck. That's the responsible thing to do.
there is a school bus full of santas parked in front of the liquor store
As long as there aren't any pictures of me humping the penguin, we are good,
just passed out again, this time at a subway. On a positive not they gave me a free sandwich, pretty sure out pity but at this point i don't care
You need to get here now. Before they realize I'm not puerto rican.
All i remember was you crying naked on the bathroom floor because you were cold. I got you a blanket and you kept kicking it off and crying because you were still cold.
1. Sorry about making it snow. 2. If it left a mess, I will be over to clean it. 3. Can that fire extinguisher still be used? If not, I'll buy a new one. 4. I just wanted to make it snow!
I just don't know about this life anymore. Quite frankly I think I belong up there in the great blue, lounging on a cloud sippin tea with Jesus
I figured out that he lasts longer when I rap during sex. He made it all the way through "Love the Way you Lie"
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
Also we had sex while listening to fleetwood Mac on vinyl. Like the 70s called and told me to fuck off
He's got the most well kempt beard I've ever seen and I need it between my thighs is basically what I'm saying
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
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