It's fine actually... I'm pretty sure he had the crookedest weiner in the world anyway.
Like he had it hanging in the wind and you just decided, "nope, I don't think that one's for me." ????
God no! I could just feel it. His clock said it was 8:00 when, clearly, it should have been midnight.
I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
the first call I got in the morning was from visa fraud prevention so yeah it was one of those nights
I have diapers under my sink. trying to convince myself to use them.
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
I'm still trying to figure out how you came back with chinese food, and a spoon covered in icing saying 'cake..'
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
we found him passed out on the baseball field with two 40oz and wearing a tophat.
Where did he get the tophat?
I just dropped a paperclip into my cleavage while talking to the company president... That's an awkward moment.
Did you at least offer to let him get it out??
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
i fell into a bathtub last night and broke the fall with my forehead. my forehead is bruised
Sent him a snap chat of him eating me out so he can relive the moment.
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
Found a pic on my phone from last night. You're drunk. Arm wrestling some guy. In the bar bathroom. At a baby changing station. It's my new wallpaper.
Randomize
