You give one guy a hand job and suddenly everyone wants to get with you
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
At one point last night while tipping the bartender you looked at him and said "If I need money later, I'm taking this back"
Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
It's going to be great. We're a perfect team to break up marriages and happiness.
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
I knew it was on when he was dancing on stage and I gave him a dollar so in return he ripped my tit out of my shirt and started sucking on it IN THE MIDDLE OF THE BAR.
I pulled my bra outta my purse. Covered in honey mustard. I still lack an explanation.
But theres a keg here and me gusta
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
Sometimes at I wake up from a dead sleep at 1am and call the bar just to hear the clink of the glasses and the pouring of the beer on tap in the backround
Like he was trying to be sexy but he had shit taste in porn so i left
Highlight your past hook-ups. You've been stabbed, shot at, run over, and chased down the road...no you can't bring new bar bitch over here!
Dude she has a friend!!!!
You know you're out of shape when you're sore after masturbating.
Randomize
