oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
you went to subway and got pissed when they refused to deep fry your sub
There's a sucker born every minute but swallowers are harder to find.
So glad I found your sister.
Her vagina smelled like bad decisions
What's the second line of that rhyme that starts "Vicodin before scotch...?"
I stayed up for hours making sure you didnt pass out in a mountain of your own puke. But when I heard you yell AWWWW FUUCCKK, somehow I knew everything would be ok
This is the second time in a week I've woken up with your bra in my bed and I've had to sit and think about how it happened.
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
Of all the kinds of relationships I've had in my life, I'd have to say, lab-partner-with-benefits takes the fuckin cake
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
I need to leave my mind and my stupid vagina are having fight over who's right
Randomize
