Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
It's a pity Stephen Hawking can't do sarcasm.
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
He just sent me a picture of me icing a cake with a butcher knife topless.
He wants me to hook up with his fiance while he watches. Text you later with how it goes.
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
Got back to find Sarah in her underwear eating peanut butter and watching Arrested Development with the thermostat at eighty.
nobody was home so I boiled the dildo
Soooo you know how I said I was trying to be a rational adult? Well that led to me fucking a rational adult today.
Sorry my phone died because I decided charging my vibrator was way more important
The cat was building a spaceship out of the carpet, my legs were cans of tomato sauce, and there was something else in that pot you gave me.
And I think she just drunkenly ordered an ipad. she said it was so pretty she couldn't keep it "locked up" because an ipad has to be let free.
Randomize
