Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
I think I breastfed the cat at some point during the night, at least that's what my nipples are saying
There's a hand-carved wooden bong in my backpack, and i really wish i could remember last night now.
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
JOY: That feeling when you crack open a handle for the first time, and the flow limiter comes off with the cap.
is it weird that I didn't think he was hot last night when I was making out with him but right now I'm Facebook stalking him and think he's really attractive??
your beer goggles are on backwards.
the manly guy you want to date so badly? he's at the club. as a drag queen. wearing higher heels than you own. think about that.
Be proud. All I did last night was roll around in my nun costume selling drugs. I love Halloween.
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
Never let him bartend when he's tripping. He sprinkled a ton of mexican shredded cheese over a jack and coke and called in a Monterey Jack Daniels.
We haven't been trashed enough to shut down a bar together in four days. I'm starting to worry that we're growing apart.
He keeps bees of course he's weird
Seriously just told the plant the cheese Pringles are mine.
It's less than a hour into 2020 and I already want to punch some people in the face
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