BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
Never drink rum straight from the bottle, even if people say it'll make you a pirate. It won't: it'll make you a bumbling shitfaced idiot who just drank rum straight from the bottle.
A freshman just referred to Home Improvement as 'tim the tool man show'. People born after 1990 are not people.
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
She can drink whiskey without a chaser and has a fridge full of whipped cream. Girlfriend potential
All i want to do is drink fuck and cry... you dont have to cater all three its more like the saddest choose your own adventure ever
You're telling me you've never sent a picture of your cock to a girl and then were all like "Oops, sorry, wrong person! By the way...You like?"
The two girls sitting next to me are asking siri "Like, uh, how do you know my name?". Do I fuck with them or fuck them?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hit a new low. I'm FB stalking him while he is lying in bed sleeping naked next to me. He fell asleep with FB still open and unlocked on his iPad.
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
Definitely just realized I wore a shirt that says "building leaders for Christ" to a hookup. Roll tide.
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
I felt like I was selling my soul to satan but then I realized I already pawned it for drug money
We broke up. My life is now 7 inches less.
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