Please don't call me names while I'm carrying your child.
the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
what do 4 police cars, 1 ambulence, and 2 fire truycks have in common?.... My driveway
Just made a coke joke and literally drooled on myself. How do we feel about pavlov's theory of conditioning now?
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
So, I'm playing the Doctor Who drinking game with my dogs, but they don't understand quite when to drink. Still counts as successful, though, right?
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
Roommate is hosting a 'sorority retreat' at our house. If you need to get laid, stumble on over.
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
do you think eating a burger while having sex counts as multitasking skills?
Oh my god.. Saw a commercial for Captain Morgan. Made me gag a little bit.
He sent me the milestone first dick pic this morning, it looked like a baby's fist holding a tree trunk. I'm frightened and aroused in equal measure.
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