The worst part was when my mom got more drunk than anyone else and started doing the Time Warp.
i wish starbucks made bloody marys
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
i just used google streetview to figure out where i spent the night last night
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
I feel the need to clarify that I did not show her my vagina.
Note for the future: whiskey syrup is AMAZING on 3am pancakes.
This is love.
Which part? The alcoholic cupcakes or the lesbian st paddys day party?
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
Life is my bitch right now. The bouncers tried to carry me out of the club, but everyone thought I was crowd surfing so everyone carried me BACK IN. Winning as fuck.
Dead. I am actually dead. Also, worst nightmare confirmed: throwing up in a four hundred person lecture.
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
Well that's very sweet of you. I have a strange feeling you're going to regret this when you sober up.
NO REGRETS FUCK DA POLICE
Randomize
