Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
Her boobs were tiny. I could have used her bra as a blind fold. Which in hindsight would have made things a lot better.
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
I'm glad we have the kind of friendship where if either of us is too drunk to fuck a hot guy, we pass the responsibility to each other and get the job done.
I just re read that. We really need to get our lives together.
Thanks for the ave Maria song you left on my phone that lasted for TEN minutes.
There are too many people on this bus for it to be even REMOTELY okay that I'm wearing a puke covered sweater
Did I actually say goodbye last night or did I just poison you with vodka and disappear?
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
Just got a snapchat from him that was a video of with the caption "my new apartment" in Brazil. I think we might not be seeing eachother anymore.
I just fell and sprained my ankle in the shower. No, I wasn't having sex. I was doing the time warp. Again.
Here when you come to your senses come back here and I'll fuck you back out of them.
The shitshow that was last night is the gift that just keeps on giving
Randomize
