There's nothing more uncomfortable than drifting into sexual fantasies on a roadtrip and realizing you have a boner with three other dudes in the car.
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
Why do fat girls all have such cute faces?
God wants them to get laid too.
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
Shut up. It sucks being the ugly friend, I would know, but someones gotta play the role
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
What am I supposed to say? "Hi new uncle in law once I tried cocaine in Mexico and every once in a while i motorboat strangers. so happy to be a part of your family"
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
Lets just say I tried to pinky promise the cop... So I was fucked up.
You keep making the old jokes & I'm gonna come down with a sudden case of low-estrogen related vaginal dryness..
Despite breaking my phone, thumb, and my dignity, last night was pretty good.
My dad called me in the middle of the night, drunk on vodka, asking for references on the Irish alphabet.
He broke both of his legs jumping out of a window to escape a coyote.
Randomize
