Nobody needs to come anywhere. Except on your face.
I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
Truelife: I made out with my ex-boyfriend's girlfriend this weekend. Thank you Captain Morgan...
Was she wearing cherry chapstick??
No. Life's not always a fairytale.....
I'm in my winter jacket and nothing else. very drunk. bring bitches.
homeboy just tried to sext with me at 8:30 in the morning while I was on a job interview...
so you did it...
obv...but still...it was inconsiderate.
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
there is no 'pace myself' on the blackout express
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
Just got a blowie during the Avengers. It's weird knowing that the high point of your life just happened.
i'd say i'm about at weeping-uncontrollably-in-a-puddle-of-my-own-tears-and-urine level
Hey, remember when Hot Stuff played in the back of the ambulance? Or no, cause of your concussion...
Just cried watching Wimbledon, worst comedown ever.
My cats name is now jello shot. How much do you love me right now?
Randomize