White coat. Heels.
if i get the "i'm engaged" text one more time, i'm going to shoot myself in the face so my cats won't eat it when i die alone.
Note: fake nails and fingering anus.... Not a good idea
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My mom is holding a picture of me, crying, and saying "where did I go wrong" over and over again.
we should drop off a car at the police station before going out tonight so we can drive home in the morning
I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
Off topic, but is it sad that Matthew and I are calculating how much sex we need to have in order to work off a taco bell burrito?
I just find it funny that nobody ever threatens to call the cops on us until we have a Harry Potter party
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
It's sad that I'm more proud of my Twitter account then my resume
I accidentally brought up how there used to be a big tree in his yard, which I could only have known if I had been Google mapping his house.
He just made this face while he was fucking me and he looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame, I had to stop him.
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