when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
atleast your grandma didn't give you her USED dildo just so you wouldn't have sex.
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
we put the last xanax in the middle and played hungry hungry hippos to see whod get it
fair is fair
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
Some great men died of syphilis. I accept your compliment.
Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways.
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
Just found weed in my belly button. Happy Saturday!
She just asked if I wanted to eat nachos off of her boobs... I'm going to marry this girl.
the worst part about living alone is not having other peoples snacks to mooch off of when you havent gone grocery shopping in three weeks. i'm so pms-y i'm about to eat a soy sauce packet
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
well we started off by chasing vodka with chocolate milk and ended up trying to befriend a crippled raccoon so that should tell you how our night went
You can have my vag. Its useless without you.
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