When my options for Friday night are being a 3rd wheel or bringing a gay man as my date i need to focus on other things in life like having a successful career.
I am drinking with my family and the average drinking tolerance is a shot and a half. I feel like the incredible hulk.
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
There is a reason Crest White Strips don't list masturbation as one of the myriad of activities to do while whitening your teeth. A very good reason.
no matter how many times i close my eyes and hit ignore on my phone. i must remind myself shit i still have to see her at work
the fire alarm went off. we werent sure whether to leave or turn the music up louder
The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..
You were so proud of your stupid "magic trick" but all you did was piss on the couch. don't talk to me for a few days.
I stood in my living room with two beers in my hand asking these said beers if they were going to drink each other. I then insisted that I would drink them and chugged both. Happy Halloween.
Guys, as my favorite vagina consultants I have to share something.
My professional advice is not to put lemons in your lady pocket.
As if I wouldn't steal Nintendo brand "Mario is my HOMEBOY!" boxers when he gave me the entire drawer to choose from.
Smoked a blunt with my dad then introduced him to cinnabon delights. Today was a good day.
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
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