let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
i hit her car. ill just send her a farmville gift in the morning. then it'll be alright.
Apparently I was playing rock paper scissors against myself for 2 hours in the bathroom mirror.
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
Don't call police on the strange man passed out in his car in the driveway. I'll be home around noon to collect him.
It feels like the devil is humping my brain with his razor sharp erection.
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
So I got cockblocked by our relationship status last night
He said he doesn't "believe" in cuddling. Can you come get me?
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
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