their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
the ice cream truck is coming omgomg
dude, it's 2 am.
but its COMING
My poor mother should have just stuffed me back up her vagina when she had the chance.
There's a lady carrying her kids toy animals in a crown royal bag. Mom of the year.
...Then she just started hitting me with a loaf of bread.
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
Just abandoned him for a bowl of soup and the living room floor...hope the window replacement guys don't get a show..I miss you!
Late night whataburger runs are great, except if you're the one that gets left black out drunk puking in the backyard drinking from the water hose
She's cute, but batshit. Like some kind of dominatrix disney princess.
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
You're the third person who's asked me for an afternoon blow connection in one day. Unreal.
That's more of a you-issue than a me-issue
Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?
Can someone please remind me later tonight that there's a taco in my purse. I may get drunk and forget I put it there
And the sexual frustration is like I'm wearing a damn horcrux
my mom tells me this morning that i was blasting teach me how to dougie at 2 am last night and refused to leave her room until she dougied with me
Randomize
