i told her that she could bring as many friends as she wanted and then she asked how many people i could fit in my bed...BEST. DAY. EVERRRR.
she is the kim kardashian of front butts
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
I HAVE A PRESENT FOR YOU AND ITS NOT MY VAGINA
They can't keep moving my court date back, i dont know if I'll survive another one of these going away to jail parties.
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
There are some sad choices of men in the ER. That one was missing teeth. Not the place to find a husband.
I am going to be so excited tomorrow when I find this box of crayons in my purse
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
Ended up in some house where this dude has a $1200 leopard cat
When you wake up with a bow tie and mustache drawn on your penis, you know you had a good night.
I puked in the back of my mom's new car because I had too much to drink at Chilis. I think I just hit rock bottom.
Sundays were made for eating Ramen pantless in bed.
I woke up this morning to find my closet lacking 98% of my clothes and a text from my male roommate saying your dresses squeeze my genitals
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