i just sat at a stop sign for 10 minutes waiting for it to turn green. i need to STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT.
He keeps saying he loves me and ruining perfectly good conversations.
So some girl kept staring at me and giving me these weird looks. That's when I realized she could probably hear the Mulan soundtrack playing on my iPod...
had to check his id this morning to remember his name.... i was wayy off
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
I looked up while we were having sex to see him covering my pillow pet's eyes with his free hand. I think I'm in love
Just walked into McDonald's and a bunch of fat girls gave me a look like I just entered their territory.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
Oh my god. That was the best half-hour of my life that didn't involve genitals.
I think I puked in the middle of sex last night if that's any indication as to how drunk I was.
I think that's the first time I had "ass rimming" scroll across my phone at work
Apparently, im the only one in the world who thinks Larry King is hot.
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
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