he's chasing his jose cuervo with hot tub water
Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
Always fun waking up to 911 as your last dialed call.
just got carried INTO the bar by 4 people. it's like watching my weekend in reverse.
you can't just make up for the fact that you broke up with me by tagging yourelf in my embarrassing facebook videos of you
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
I may or may not be wearing slippers and a TMNT hat. This thing better not have a dress code.
Nothing says Panama City like condoms washing up on the shore.
Sitting in my junior high parking lot high on ambien talking to a stranger I met on tinder. What is life?
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
I'm not drunk or hungover and I don't have to work. My body is sooo confused!
People probably think I’m a fangirl bc I go to so many shows but it’s really bc I like fucking the tour manager
Randomize
