yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
high people should be assigned attendants
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
You threw a bottle at the bartender and then stole his tip jar. However, you were quickly KO'd by the bartender. Solid right hook.
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
Just finished putting caution tape around the tv. Sober me needs to prepare.
Okay! I've got my sketchbook, my purse, my coat, and a knife hidden in my cleavage. I'm ready for to meet my blind date~
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
I just almost said to a customer "P as in Pussy"
Eating power bars and masterbating... That's kinda my life right now. Is this what having a boyfriend means?
You pretended to be Borat in that weird slingshot bathing suit and then proceeded to send another dick pic/nude selfie and said you weren't naked because you were wearing a hat.
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
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