On a scale of one to Chris Brown, how angry are you?
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
I bought the love spell lotion from victoria secret so it atleast smells like a girl is present while I'm masturbating
its barely noon and he already threw up and i have second degree burn
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
I just had a vision of confetti exploding out of someone's vagina to the sound of air horns... I think that would be welcoming.
I like the way you think.
I did not get laid last night bc my condoms were too small. I'm allowed to be dreary
On Friday, can we drink like its Civil Wars times and the doctor's coming to saw off our gangreen infected legs?
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
We just won 1800 at the casino and are going to the strip club. Who gives a fuck if it's 5pm
If there's anything else you're planning on stealing from me, please let me know so I can set it on fire
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
Please tell me that nice older woman you're with at the bar is not your comp&lit professor.
I currently don't understand fingers.
Randomize
