Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
Ugh I just know that when I take off his pants his underwear will have Megan's Law written all over them.
Update: no underwear. Greeeeen light.
When the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie, you're a dumbass
it wasn't sex, it was awkward naked time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
you puked out of a dead sleep and didnt wake up
She gave me a bj in her parent's kitchen while I ate the rest of her mom's birthday cake. Fuck. Yes.
He compared my vagina to the first time he tried cocaine
just used my nephews bottle to take my birth control
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just laid my head on this pillow and I smelt your penis. It was comforting.
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
We're fucking and Lee Greenwood God Bless the USA comes on and he came. It was the most Roll Tide America moment of my life.
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
Why am I sleeping on top of the fridge?
You were playing hide and seek with the dog. she couldn't find you and you passed out.
We still getting married? Or were you day drinking
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