My new years resolution is to be alive new years morning
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
oh no, im for sure still drunk. i wana eat evrything in the fancy feast commercial... everything
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
I feel like a bottle of fireball rented a bull dozer and ran me over until I was left without a shred of my dignity
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
No, he came home, unscrewed all of the lightbulbs, and threw them in the sink.
Randomize
