What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
i forgot to tell you that olivia sent me a text yesterday that the mormon girl got caught with weed in her vagina at school
At what point during this road trip should I let them know I've been drinking in the backseat the whole time and can't take my turn driving?
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
I don't care. I'll text you about my butthole whenever I please. That's what you signed up for in this relationship.
today is just not my day... it could be raining penises and I would get hit in the face by a vag
Come get me we have a petting zoo to throw up in.
Dude we both faced 40s of steel reserve which is like saying, "Hey, I'm a complete piece of shit!"
I just sugar scrubbed my vagina. If I don't get laid tonight, me and the universe are gonna have some problems.
I know you just got dumped by your gf but believe there is still good in the world. I just smoked a joint and took a fucking unbelievable poop. Give me a call tomorrow.
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
Randomize
