You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
highlight of my day: just saw a crying girl get dropped off at home wearing only socks, booty shorts, and a dirty wifebeeter. I wonder what happened to the costume...
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
his recent searches consisted of "World record for not bathing" and "Miley Cyrus vs Taylor Swift". Not even i am that desperate.
the paramedic just looked at me like "you again?"
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
You just said we could build a blanket and pillow "fuck fort." Of course I'm never leaving you.
Idk I've been drinking all day and they're having me blow shit up. Like dont let the drunk chick play with fire and explosives. Common sense 101. I will fuck something up
Should I tell this TSA agent his fly is down while he is trying to hit on this chick?
For the first time in my 26 years of life, I'm washing jizz out of my ponytail.... High five yourself later.
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
Oh. Why can't it be something easy, like a punch card for blowjobs?
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
Randomize
