Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
Do you think "I had sex with my co-worker last night I don't think I can come in today" is a good excuse?
The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
We were busted for public indecency in the back of my car in the parking lot. This time we were just reading my Cosmo magazine.
I wasn't interested in him...but then he played The Office theme song on acoustic guitar. I'm sorry.
hey did i steal that bike before or after the ball dropped, casue i might have broken my resolution already
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
You act as if I'm the first person to pee in the Taco Bell drive thru at 2 AM, I'm sure a lot worse things have happen in that drive thru than my urine.
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
THE SUPER HOT BARTENDER WHO LOOKS LIKE RYAN GOSLING JUST WALKED IN. BUT HE DOESNT EVEN WALK HE GLIDES. LIKE AN ANGEL.
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
On my way to return shoes I bought so that I can afford to buy a pregnancy test. Is this adulthood?
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
she crawled a good forty meters just to whisper in my ear... "dildon't"
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
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