i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
Just got a citation from campus security for an "accordion disturbance."
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
Springtime is officially here. I just used pool water to fill up the bong
On a scale of 1 to last weekend, how hungover are you?
My mom and dad are smoking a joint while lecturing me on what to bring and how to act in Europe. I'll finish this glass of wine and head over.
He blew a .19 and then slurred "well I did have some rum cake earlier today officer".
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
Woke up to the UT campus police fishing my boxers out of the university pool, guess it was a good night.
There is a stockpile of mangos and vodka in my backyard and I'm at least 90% sure you had something to do with it.
Surprise court date day!!! Wake the fuck up!
He couldn't give me an orgasm, but he did give me a UTI.
Our breakfast options are microwave popcorn, wavy lays and fireball
Well, I sent nudes with an Elmo t shirt on the floor... so there's that.
The logic in me says "don't text him" .But the vagina in me says "text him".
Randomize
