a girl walking in front of me just packed her cigarettes 72 times and yes i counted
how much adderall did you take today?
Just tell him to eat fruit before so it tastes good. Then it's just like shotgunning a smoothie
Tequila bombs in champagne seemed like a good idea at the time.
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
You need to tell him your pregnant or we need to stop playing doubles beer-pong. My liver is begging you.
I wiped my mouth this morning with a pine tree branch after I threw up on the side of the road. Tis the season
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
he kept telling me how much his girlfriend would love me while we were making. why does tequila always do this to me?
I just wish I had a snapshot of his attempted front flip off the bar. There are some things that are worth getting a life ban for, and the moment of impact with his foot and that lady's face was one of those things.
Will you fuck me while I eat my burrito though? I'm kind of hungry.
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
I had perfectly good intentions but my penis had other ideas and now I need a place to crash what do you say
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