i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
I woke up next to her boyfriend and she woke up next to mine....
This is like a fucked up game of musical chairs.
I want what they have, but in the meantime I have a whole bottle of rum to which I'm quite devoted
Nothing like snapchatring dick pics to a\nMarried woman while your girlfriend destroys Taco Bell in the next room. Almost caught, worth it. Got boobs back
it's gotten to the point where I just look in my closet, think, "which article of clothing behaves most like a towel?" and then just go with that
Did I really just send a work email with cum instead of come? feck me
i regret nothing
brb throwing up in the dishwasher
i regret everything
I would literally only have sex with a dinosaur right now.
You faceplanted on the railroad tracks and when I tried to tell you to get up, you told me you were "taking a quick breather"
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
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