we left the bar for like 10 minutes last night and moved his car so it wouldnt get towed. neither of us have a clue where it is right now.
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
he rubbed his balls on my face to wake me up.. this friends with benefits thing is getting out of hand.
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
For Valentine's Day I've purchased six lighters and I'm decorating them for him. I'm on a full ride to an art school and this is what I'm using my talents for. An intervention is needed. Please stop letting me date stoners.
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
Can I also remind you that we insisted on touching his mustache?
Well of course I remember it took up like 20 minutes of my night.
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
Adulthood is weird i just cleared a check larger than my gross income from 2011 but i also just did coke during my lunch break
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
My v day was great. There's a cum stain in the shape of a handprint on my sheets
So will your sis find it a compliment if I tell her I lost out on some awesome dick to go to her bday dinner???
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
Randomize
