If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
What are you drinking?
Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
Did someone do a keg stand in my bathtub?
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
I can't take any time off so I'll be here drinking mimosas til I puke at home with my kitty
Rumble strips road head = magical
When this bachelor party is over and your life is in ruins, you have my permission to die.
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
Girl. There is no more toilet paper. You should have seen the twerking I just did to shake the pee off.
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
Can I send you a random dick pic? It's got a lightsaber tattoo
Randomize
