no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
some people wear their heart on their sleeve but you just wear your vagina on your face.
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
You were Q-tipping mashed potatoes out of your ear.
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
"you can only have my number if you answer all the questions on this trivial pursuit card correctly"
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
Please put me on a plane and hypontize me into forgetting the little bit of last night that I do remember.
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
Would it be rude to use my vibrator? like he forfeited his right to be mad when he left me orgasmless...right?
Would you by any chance know if there is a proper protocol for traveling with one's vibrator? I wouldn't want the TSA to rip open my suitcase in front of my boss.
I don't know what else is in your wedding gift, but I just pulled out a pair of handcuffs in front of her grandmother.
Also a whip and a blindfold. Don't be a bitch, enjoy it!
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
You know that we wouldn’t even be talking about all this if you would have kept your candy consumption judgement comments to yourself.
Randomize
