I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
there's a wrestler here in a Ferrari//puma hoodie who is telling girls his win//loss record as a pickup line.
Down at cameli's and some homeless dude just pulled out a taser. Awesome.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm at verizon, the guy asked me why my phone is full of seeds. Deff. Not leaving my phone with you anymore.
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
Thats why you always identify the subtext of a blowjob before you accept it.
Carpe scrotum. Grab life by the balls.
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
Well I went on a freakin rampage and destroyed a fan and claimed that it wasn't doing its fan duties... Then I knocked on everybody's doors in the hall and asked if they were content with their fan's performance and if not I would take care of it...
I just want a pillowcase full of fast food so I can eat and sleep this hangover away
His arresting officer when they were busting up the squat party recognized him from the anti-drone protest. He was like Jesus kid, you were sober last time.
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
For a second I thought he was going to give me an intervention
You can't give interventions in a bar!
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