recycled a plan b box. kill a baby. save a tree.
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
I think I'll handle my grief by throwing myself headlong into lesbianism. Seems like a fitting tribute to you.
You told us that you don't have to wait in line at Taco Bell. Then, drove up to the window and grabbed someone else's food.
YOU IS KIND. YOU IS SMART. YOU IS IMPORTANT. YOU IS CLEANING YOUR OWN VOMIT.
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
I need a conscience and I need it yesterday.
I snapchatted him 4 pictures of me as Tarzan's dad so if he never talks to me again at least we'll know why
I thought you died. Don't forget it's burger night.
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
If you really hate him do what I do: give him an amazing night of unforgettable sex then dump him. You’ll ruin sex for him because new girls won’t compare
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