So ignoring my calls doesnt work if you update your facebook a minute later.
We are possibly on our way, unless we see the limo full of strippers.
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
Its 6:30 and I'm shotguning a busch ice while taking a shit. Outlook for work today: interesting
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thanks again for allowing my sister to lose her virginity on your bed.
I was just handed jelly beans by a guy in a penguin costume. Standby for confirmation on if they are actually drugs.
I am way too attached to fictional lesbians.
My boss just called me for legal advice. What has my life become?
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you know anyone with a stuffed cougar? I want one for a self portrait to hang in my house. A bobcat or lynx might work too.
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
Well if you don't want to be kicked out before last call don't I would suggest stop drinking whiskey and don't call the giant bouncer with the neck tattoo "princess"
Wait you actually sent a text to your self saying “love you I miss you"?
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
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