I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
my sister just canceled her nose job because she thought it would hurt too much
It'll hurt less than being alone
I just told my boyfriend I think I might be pregnant using Emoji icons....
which icon did you use to tell him he's not the father?
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
thankjk goddddn taco bell uis open htis lateee!
you do know it's eleven in the afternoon, right?
Getting too drunk for the hot dog vendor to serve me is possibly a sign of an alcohol problem. I threw up in the sewer grates next to his stand
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
If she were to ever cheat on her husband, I'm positive I'm the the go to guy. Which flatters me and weirds me out at the same time.
She was eating whipped cream out of a plunger at 3 am in the morning. Yet somehow she still had an elegance about her.
Listen, you need to start thinking with your vagina and not with your heart... That emotional shit is for your 30s.
Opted for cash back rather than the 10% extra I'd get for store credit, solely for drinks tonight.
You're lovely.
You know you're hung over when the glare from the cream cheese on your bagel is just too bright...
Remember when you gave their 80 year old doorman a line of molly at 5am?
Facebook just reminded me of the time I found two IHop cheese sticks in my hand bag. Those were the days.
Listen, I just paid for a hotel room, so I didn't have to have sex in his car. I'm adulting successfully.
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