Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
I'm so bored, I can only pretend that this truck is a spaceship for so long.
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
This guy keeps going off in the metal detector. When is it appropriate for me to punch him in the throat just in case?
Then he rubbed shampoo all over my arm and shouted, "Garnier FUCK THIS."
This guy on the tube is sooooooo high. Eyes are bloodshot and he's licking his headphone cords.
I'm pretty sure my munchies are the only reason Good and Plenty is still around
My frontal lobe is being piloted by Jack Daniels right now.
I can't remember the last time I saw a penis in person that I didn't see a million times on text first
After last night I am convinced that you are the human embodiment of alcoholism and bad decisions.
THERE ARE LEGITLY 4 SEPARATE BITE MARKS ON MY DICK. WHAT. THE. FUCK.
Legitimately*
Go fuck yourself
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
my Mom is now my Eskimo sister... she fucked my ex in my bed and took a selfie
Grandpa just whipped it out and started pissing on the way to the game stuck in traffic. I saw EVERYTHING. :(
Randomize
