I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
We spilled a whole bottle of mouth wash and then proceeded to roll around and make out in it. At least I smell minty fresh.
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
When you see a guy in a wheelchair try to be cool and pop a wheelie, and then fall over backward and hit his head, is it funny or sad?
Do you remember our dinosaur noises from last night ? Breaaaahhhhhppp
Dude I just saw a beer truck w taps in the side... It's like god heard my prayers and sent me a gift from heaven
I just sat watching friends in the bathtub by candlelight...nights like this make me wonder if I ever want to be in a relationship again
For whatever reason, whenever she's drunk off Crown, all she wants to do is jerk me off with her feet.
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
So drunk last night I reviewed my recent anazon purchase of secret deodorant. Trust me, it was eloquent.
A world without bacon flavored condoms is not one I want to live in.
My co-worker accidentally texted me regarding the threesome him and other one are planning.
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
Randomize
