Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
I took a shit in your bathtub. Nothings off limits
Escaped ambulance. Meet me at your apartment.
I was fingering her, she was moaning, and we were singing Mulan
I really thought you were going to tell me you were pregnant on facebook chat. FACEBOOK CHAT. I almost cried.
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
I'm at the bar alone. Is this how you feel?
When I realised he had a girlfriend I just started telling them about my ex and how I write poetry about him. Which I then read to them. They just gave me pity looks and left me to finish my spliff alone.
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
You made out with two different species that night
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
Let's play another riveting game of "Whose boxers are hanging on my fence?"
I just saw your brother in some random persons yard climbing a tree. Just saying.
Probably on drugs.
I asked him if we could have sex sometime and he sent me a three page long text about his feelings for me. that's the only possible situation I've ever run into where a "k" response would have been more appropriate.
Best part though was when he wanted to cuddle and I was like, I'm going to go.
Randomize
