i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
Words of Wisdom: ordering a pitcher of whiskey cokes, putting a straw in it, and calling it your drink is not socially acceptable
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
I took a shit in your bathtub. Nothings off limits
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After the party last night, I dreamt I continued drinking... Apparently my subconscious didn't think I'd had enough...
We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends
Dude did I even see you at the bar. Cause I was for sure there then the next second apparently I was crying next to my Christmas tree because nobody believed in me.
Also...I'm semi-dating the drug dealer that took me to bible study
Don't need my thirties to be known as the decade of "new types of shits from drinking" like last night.
Last night when we were having sex he put the condom on backwards the first time. While he was putting the second one on I blew up the first one, made it into a balloon and hit him in the head with it. I think we're over the honeymoon stage.
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