I hate drunken dyslexia, i thought she said "someone to do" not "something to do" long story short i now have a restraining order.
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
Oh my god it's like Minesweeper. I can tell there's sex in three of the four rooms, but which one is the safe one?
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
I convinced a girl making out is a secret handshake
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
What is my life coming to that I have to cross state lines to get laid?
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
I think it may be easier if I stay drunk/high til the wedding. You game?
Randomize
