i felt like we were having sex on ultimate fighter, and people on the outside kept yelling ELBOW ELBOW! KNEES KNEES!
It must have been true love
I don't call true love eating a bag of doritos and then going down on each other
i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
Cool, so I just walked in on my grandfather checking his prostate in the kitchen.
It took 5 minutes to find my bra.. in his car.
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
Well at least it wasn't the first time I threw up out of a second story window
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
I have the liquor shits and this time, it's personal.
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
Even if they did assume we were doing kinky shit, it's not like they're gonna be like, "HALT SATAN! INTAKE SOME JESUS AND VOMIT YOUR SINS!"
Randomize
