just bought miller high life, hungry man dinners, and a bottle of lube. you win life, you win.
you know that hot chick that stutters? talk about an awkward orgasm
Just puked in a mcdonalds cup while driving. Didn't even swerve.
Drinking with birthday clown in the backyard shed at a 5 year olds birthday party at 12 in the afternoon. My life doesn't need any adjustments
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Exactly how does jacking off in my purse count as a 'early christmas present'?
Things you owe me: a sober apology, $12, the removal of bbq sauce from my doorknob
She was telling me which girls she thought I should fuck or not at the bar. Why can't all one night stands be that cool after?
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
How do you politely tell someone to get out of your house in Russian
There were firefighters and a fire truck up the street. I asked what was wrong and their exact words were "Just a tiny explosion; it'll be all right"
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
Can you cover for me after lunch? I’ve never seen a guy who cums as much as my new Side Dick so now I need to clean the house before my husband gets home
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