Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
Just fell off a train. Bad.
So i'm in mason getting an ultrasound.. and there are a bunch of hicks in here with their wild ass children and this one young mom yells at her kid "harley sit!"
You should introduce yourself as garth. As in garth brooks.
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
He just tagged everyone he's slept with this year in a 'memories of 2011' tweet
I'm about to initiate a game of drunk UNO.
Drunk UNO has officially been banned from now until forever.
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
You may have gone on a date, but I ate chicken nuggets shaped like dinosaurs for dinner tonight. I think we both know who the real winner is here.
That's a beautiful sentiment.
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
Oh also we fucked while one of the old Rudolph movies was playing on tv so it was festive
I was about to break it off with him because I realised he only wanted me for sex, until I realised that I only wanted HIM for sex. Win/win
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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