So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
wait do you know what youre gonna say if they ask how youre getting back?
yes. helicopter.
My roommate just got home. Made an entire package of bacon. Ate it. And then went to bed.
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
I am solely responsible for the birth of their child. I mean, I did push them into the room and hold the door shut yelling "punch that kitty!". It has to be a sign.
A worker across the alley is wearing your sombrero sans cat barf.
Just because Aaron is a gender neutral name does not mean I am letting you name your baby after a drug dealer
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
I just had the weirdest moment. Made eye contact at the bar with a girl who has seen my vagina.
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
Basically I will actually need a reindeer pulled sleigh to make it to all the penises in one night.
Yeah it got awkward when the two guys we were playing beer pong against realized that I'd hooked up with both of them. Their teamwork declined after that.
Remember that pair of super cute shorts I pooped in? I miss those 😔
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
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