don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
Weddings at vineyards should never be allowed to happen. I'm pretty sure I drank every bottle they produced in 2008.
I think it's our patriotic duty to get high and watch the state of the union tonight
Worst ten minutes of my life, it's was like trying to put a marshmallow in a piggy bank....
He was going down on me as I discovered a spaghetti-O on my boob. Its been a while since I faked it.
I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
I think I may have some undocumented and undiscovered std that causes girls to go bat shit crazy. How you got it is beyond me
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
I have invented a new game to play on campus. It's called "Mormons or Pledges?" It's fantastic.
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns
Juice tastes so weird without alcohol
i haven't seen you in two years and we have like 16 hours, all i want is cuddles, wine, and some light groping
Randomize
