Texts From Last Night

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  (720): View more from Colorado

  I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.

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  (720): I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare. http://tfl.nu/5d0o
  Replies (3) Good night (1187) Bad night (742)
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  (734): View more from Michigan

  Pregnant stripper...not hot.

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  (734): Pregnant stripper...not hot. http://tfl.nu/9fe2
  Replies (20) Good night (684) Bad night (1613)
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  (813): View more from Florida

  Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book

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  (813): Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book http://tfl.nu/eyxq
  Replies (12) Good night (2864) Bad night (719)
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  (850): View more from Florida

  Please dont jizz on my ds screen.

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  (850): Please dont jizz on my ds screen. http://tfl.nu/cm8h
  Replies (18) Good night (853) Bad night (5113)
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  (860): View more from Connecticut

  I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes

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  (860): I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes http://tfl.nu/kyj9
  Replies (23) Good night (4518) Bad night (923)
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  (770): View more from Georgia

  he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario

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  (770): he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario http://tfl.nu/em7y
  Replies (6) Good night (823) Bad night (3657)
• Favorite

  (757): View more from Virginia

  1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat

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  (757): 1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat http://tfl.nu/2xgh
  Replies (3) Good night (1130) Bad night (3258)
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  (323): View more from California

  Hey bro, did you ever hear from the background investigator that i was supposed to bang?

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  (323): Hey bro, did you ever hear from the background investigator that i was supposed to bang? http://tfl.nu/58hv
  Replies (7) Good night (2480) Bad night (949)
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  (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  got so drunk i was kicked out of my own birthday party and tried taking a bottle of vodka with me

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  (717): got so drunk i was kicked out of my own birthday party and tried taking a bottle of vodka with me http://tfl.nu/g14l
  Replies (6) Good night (4112) Bad night (1024)
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  (406): View more from Montana

  I'm on my "fiiiiirrrst" glass of wine- the quotes mean it's the last of the bottle- so I really need you to pick up your phone so we can talk about this

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  (406): I'm on my "fiiiiirrrst" glass of wine- the quotes mean it's the last of the bottle- so I really need you to pick up your phone so we can talk about this http://tfl.nu/2qka
  Replies (2) Good night (1447) Bad night (733)
• Favorite

  (613): View more from Ontario

  We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."

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  (613): We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet." http://tfl.nu/xflq
  Replies (3) Good night (1663) Bad night (852)
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  (902): View more from Pr Edwrd Is, Nva Sctia

  Pretty sure I picked a cat up off the street and took him home with me, fed him tuna, then let him go

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  (902): Pretty sure I picked a cat up off the street and took him home with me, fed him tuna, then let him go http://tfl.nu/ajer
  Replies (7) Good night (1109) Bad night (417)
• Favorite

  (416): View more from Toronto

  drinking vodka, listening 2 smh at 530am slow cooking beef stew. you'll enjoy the stew and worry abt me in the morning. bon apatite

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  (416): drinking vodka, listening 2 smh at 530am slow cooking beef stew. you'll enjoy the stew and worry abt me in the morning. bon apatite http://tfl.nu/pmot
  Replies (7) Good night (584) Bad night (318)
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  (818): View more from California

  She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.

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  (818): She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink. http://tfl.nu/8b21
  Replies (5) Good night (330) Bad night (693)
• Favorite

  (732): View more from New Jersey

  Listen I took a family sized bottle of merlot to the face last night and there's an svu marathon on. Give me some time please.

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  (732): Listen I took a family sized bottle of merlot to the face last night and there's an svu marathon on. Give me some time please. http://tfl.nu/0g2f
  Replies (0) Good night (643) Bad night (310)

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