I'm home now. bring me food and boobies
I'm outside your house...sorry I feel like I don't need formal invites anymore.
I didn't think I could chip a tooth while giving a blowjob until I met him.
I just woke up to three voicemails from you. In the first one you just straight laughed for 3 minutes. In the second you did bird calls. In the third you were hysterically crying. Have fun last night?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Listen man this isn't about soccer. It's about America and day drinking... Your two favorite things now get your ass over here
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
We can't be fuck buddies. You stare into my eyes while we fuck.
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Most people would probably take his lack of responses as a queue to stop. But nope, not me. I just keep going. And that's why I don't have a bf, just a little weinered friend
I convinced a girl making out is a secret handshake
Wow just discovered I can communicate my favorite sex positions using only emojis god bless this age of technology
This is like the first time all week I've properly taken my birth control. My ovaries are so stoked I just know it.
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
Everytime after he came, he'd laugh uncontrolably for ten mintutes. He was sober..
Randomize